What Do I Still Lack?

This was the question the rich young ruler asks Jesus after realizing there was still a leak in his soul even though he'd done everything else required of him in "the law."

He didn't lie.

He honored his father and mother.

He never killed anyone.

He never stole.

He even loved his neighbor as himself.

But all that wasn't enough. He was still searching. He was still missing critical pieces in the puzzle of a whole heart.

So he bravely and boldly hunts Jesus down in desperation and asks him,

"WHAT DO I STILL LACK?"

His question leapt off the pages of my Bible this morning and floated in front of me like a flashy Las Vegas billboard. 

I could easily list for Jesus all the ways I've sacrificed for Him and the Kingdom. How many years I've given in service and how much I've followed "the law."

But this question confronts my comforts.

Because I too still know I've not "surrendered all."

This dangerous question is one I know Jesus wants ME to ask Him today and place before me each new morning. This question acting like a daily ritual of surrender and dependence and deepening of my devotion. 

This question invites Jesus to "search me and test me" and "know my anxious thoughts." 

Perhaps this question will allow Jesus to highlight my tight grip on money as He did the young rich man. Or perhaps He'll sound the alarm on my incessant need to check my phone first thing in the morning. Perhaps He'll confront my perfectionism and my need for control.

Whatever vice He illuminates, I pray I have the courage to enter His "unforced rhythms of grace" as Eugene Peterson imagines Jesus saying. To trust that He indeed has all the missing pieces to the puzzle of my deepest inner needs. And to give Him as much "yes" as I can possibly give each new day.